“I think I am finally clean.” – Clean, Taylor Swift #1989
Lately, I’ve been thinking what if my heart is like a room?
I wish my heart is like a room. So I can clean it. I can do a general cleaning from time to time just to make sure all that I feel is all that I wanted to.
I wanted to sweep my insides to get rid of the left over heartaches.
I wanted to wipe, or vacuum even, my deepest parts so that no mark or stain of sadness stays in there.
I wanted to paint the walls of my heart a bright yellow so that I won’t ever have to feel blue.
I want to renovate it all, so I can start anew.
But my heart is not a room that I can polish and wax.
I get a smile on my face.
And as I realize it, I shook my head and say
“No way. It’s never going to happen.”
So I resist the smile and close my eyes
Yank one hand on my chest and whisper
“Heart, hold it in a little longer.”
(c) Karen Clide Montegrande, 2015
“It sucks that we miss people like that. You think you’ve accepted that someone is out of your life, that you’ve grieved and it’s over, and then bam. One little thing, and you feel like you’ve lost that person all over again.”
I attempted to imitate film photographs! This is the best I can come up with right now. These days, I’ve been quite interested with old school photography and I’m wondering if I can still get a camera that uses films. And in that case, does anyone still sell films? Anyway, I’ll let you know if I manage to get one.
It’s Wednesday already. Have a great day and keep on smiling! 🙂
“I go to seek a Great Perhaps.”
The Great Perhaps. Up to now, I’m still not sure of the meaning behind the words The Great Perhaps. But I believe that it is something more that you have always wanted to do and not sure of how you’re going to do it. It might seem impossible but still you’re wholeheartedly ready to take the risks and jump with your eyes closed.
I wanted to seek a Great Perhaps.
I wanted to do more than I believe I possibly could.
And I needed all the courage and strength that I could gather to do it. This morning, I tried to take the step but at the last minute I chickened out. I’m afraid that I might get a NO for an answer.
Somewhere, I have the read the words “Unless you try, the answer is always no.” I think it’s right. I need to take the chance. I need to be brave. How on earth am I going to do it? Help meeee.
“Sometimes, all you need is just ten seconds of insane courage.”
I’ll try again tonight. The Great Perhaps will be mine.
Jehovah please help me.