Do you ever had that moment when you decided to tell yourself,
“Heart, let’s just stop here”,?
I think I already did.
Though I never knew when, I never knew how, I never knew where.
When your heart has already grown tired, I think it shuts off automatically.
Not the case where you die or had a heart attack.
It’s more of somehow losing it’s habit of beating really, really fast.
Really fast that you don’t know if you’re scared or excited, but in any case it hurts.
It’s a process though. A very long one.
You have to undergo a series of sleepless nights and tired eyes.
And with the help of sad songs and movies, you tend to be more alone in your solitary sadness.
Then one day it will just stop.
I mean everything has to stop someday, right?
Even love and hate, I think.
So don’t worry if you’re lonely now.
Everyone has gone through that.
Moreover, knowing that someday it will take a halt and will never come back.
Cry if you need to.
Listen to more heartbreak songs.
Watch more sad movies.
Sit with your loneliness.
Take your time.
Welcome yourself to the human experience.
For one day, you’ll just realize that you made it through.
And your heart is ready for that roller coaster ride again.
(c) Karen Clide Montegrande, 2014