Somewhere in Between

They come upon me all silent and menacing like Pinkerton Detectives, and they flank me – Depression on my left, Loneliness on my right. They don’t need to show me their badges, I know these guys very well. We’ve been playing a cat-and-mouse game for years now. Though I admit that I am surprised to meet them in this elegant Italian garden at dusk. This is no place they belong.

I say to them, “How did you find me here? Who told you I had come to Rome?”

Depression , always the wise guy, says, “What- you’re not happy to see us?”

“Go away”, I tell him.

Loneliness, the more sensitive cop, says, “I’m sorry ma’am. But I might have to tail you the whole time you’re traveling. It’s my assignment.” 

“I’d really rather you didn’t”, I tell him, and he shrugs almost apologetically , but only moves closer.

Then they frisk me. They empty my pockets of any joy I had been carrying there. Depression even confiscates my identity; but he always does that. Then Loneliness starts interrogating me, which I dread because it always goes on for hours. He’s polite but relentless, and he always trips me up eventually. He asks if I have any reason to be happy that I know of. He asks why I am all by myself tonight, yet again.

Eat Pray Love


If I had given up on myself that day, I don’t know what might have happened to me. *sigh*

Seriously, sadness is something that haunts everyone. Even the happiest people. Yes, even them. 

It’s lunch break but I’m still typing this instead of eating. I’m quite irritated by the absurdity of this environment that I’m in. Why can’t people be nice to everyone? They, most of the times, can make me feel that I am doing nothing right. It seems so unfair, you know being blamed by something you didn’t do. And getting no credit for all that you have done.

I know I don’t want to live a life trying to please everyone but I can’t help but feel bad. Though, I know my life is for serving and pleasing Jehovah only, sometimes I get tired of all the haters (I can’t find the right words to describe them).

Hayyyy. Di na bale, even if this day is not that good I’m still looking forward for the evening when I’ll receive good stories from a friend about his field service today and all his inspiring words about doing your best. 🙂 

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